Vanilla - Best Flavor Ever

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Munki
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Postby Munki » Wed Oct 31, 2007 4:39 pm

The problem with Vanilla, is that Dreyers CLEARLY favor it. I mean, Vanilla has more delivery paths which translates directly in to it winning more Taste Competitions. Not only that, they have Vanilla Sundaes... I mean, in a taste competition they are almost unbeatable. Meanwhile Strawberries unique dish, Strawberry Smoothies, just are a glorified shake, with NO fudge topping.

In the end, the ingredients for Vanilla are pretty much worse in every way to Strawberry Ingredients. But they will always win in taste competitions due to Dreyer's obvious Vanilla Bias.
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Postby Ved » Wed Oct 31, 2007 5:18 pm

DON'T EVEN BRING UP DREYERS WHEN YOU HAVEN'T FUCKING TASTED BREYERS BITCH THE BREYERS EXPERIENCE IS ICE CREAM

REAL MEN TAKE THEIR ICE CREAM STRAIGHT WITH NO BULLSHIT ADDONS: TOPPINGS ARE FOR NOOBS

Dreyers is low low low quality high fructose corn syrup ice cream substitute garbage, Space shuttle astronaut dry ice cream is better then that swill. I've crapped out better tasting shit then a scoop of Dreyers. I heard that the nipples of the animals Dreyers use get so chaffed when you try to milk them you get a squirt of pus and blood along with the poison they call milk from those drugged up death cows. They get their vanilla "flavor" from squished maggots mixed with the tears of orphans.

Now Breyers is hand churned by your grand mother using old world techniques. The milk is from cows that are royalty, hell they're GODS, and they eat better then you or I ever will. The expert Breyers ice cream chefs have french accents and spend months polishing each and every batch to creamy perfection. And the vanilla beans! Sweet jesus, the beans! Hand grown by bean craftsman, they create a truely original work of art that literally defines the flavor as we know it. You might pay a little more yes, but when your mouth is having multiple orgasms you'll be damn glad you went with Breyers instead of the D-Word. I can't even mention it by name now because it enrages me so much.
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Postby Ved » Thu Nov 01, 2007 10:12 am

I win the internet
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Postby Screwtape » Thu Nov 01, 2007 10:17 am

I think your disdain for Dreyer's is uncalled for. Vanilla is vanilla no matter who makes it. Sure, Dreyer's is known for being about the bottom line, cutting corners, but they make decent vanilla. They also have a habit of buying out the competition and having every vanilla ice cream made under the same umbrella of companies. Its not the best, but its good enough.

Breyer's is better, this is true, but its just another wolf in sheep's skin. If you want real quality vanilla, Haagen-Dazs wins. TheyI've managed to implement all the strengths of vanilla into one neat little package. Granted I can't stand it anymore, but its because I ate it for almost 3 years. Now I'm just exploring others including some specialty ones, like Coldstone.

Your anger towards Dreyer's is uncalled for. You treat it as if it were Blue Bunny or something!
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Postby Mhya » Thu Nov 01, 2007 2:52 pm

Ben & Jerry's pwns you all. Total ez mode.
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Postby Ug » Thu Jun 12, 2008 12:51 pm

Toppings are for noobs? I'll fucking tell you what's fucking for fucking newbs, fucker: Fucking Vanilla.

Anyone can swallow that shit without chewing. You want to talk skillz? Show me your pistachio and dark chocolate moves. Let me see you masticate cherry and lime sherbet at the same time, bitch.

Vanilla pwnz? Shit. That's easy mode. Stop being a spectator and man up.

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Postby Baile » Thu Jun 19, 2008 8:55 am

cough cough *vanilla blunt* cough cough
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Re: Vanilla - Best Flavor Ever

Postby Sord » Fri Mar 13, 2009 12:32 am

I finished my vanilla cone too fast. When I bought it, I thought I'd be eating on it for a good long time but before I knew it, I was at the end. The flavored bottom of the cone was too small and everyone is able to get sprinkles, practically for free. Just show up at the ice cream parlor and you are showered with sprinkles. I put in a lot of time at the parlor, getting to know the people behind the counter so I could score extra toppings but it seems like the store philosophy has changed. Everyone walks in and gets free toppings now.

And the cones are too easy to eat. I like a little crunch to my cones, I want to have to work at chewing them a bit before swallowing but these ones are soft, even an old timer with no teeth can gum one down with no problems at all.

Don't get me started on the taste competitions. The latest flavor, Chocolate caramel vanilla swirl with toffee chunks, is prevalent in every contest. None of the other flavors are able to compete effectively. People argue that its the perfect blend of multiple flavors. The other ice creams only provide one or two flavors at best. Some require some exotic toppings to even compare and not everyone has the time to track down these special toppings. I have a feeling that the other ice creams will have their flavor improved or the chocolate caramel vanilla swirl with toffee chunks may end up losing the toffee. I'm so tired of my ice cream flavors being altered because of taste competitions.
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Re: Vanilla - Best Flavor Ever

Postby Lightfeather » Fri Mar 13, 2009 1:26 am

I’m an icecream-tard and have to read up on how to enjoy my cone before I actually get to the parlor. Then when I’m there and they ask me what toppings I’d like, I have to consult a spreadsheet to make sure I’m getting the very best toppings for my flavor. As I’m eating, I always wonder if I’m doing it correctly.

Then I drip on my silk shirt and everyone laughs.
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